Hello,everyone,my name is Tracy,I am studying nutrition in QUT. I am from China and I am from Daniel 3. I accepted Christ in march this year in hope Brisbane Christian church.
I think god has done a lot of amazing work on me, I feel like my mind is changing and life is changing as well. The most obvious two areas are study and emotion.I will talk about study first. When I was in china, I studied in the top high school in our city,which means the incredible stress and pressure. I tried hard,I spent almost all the time on study, I read the history book during lunch time and spent a lot sleeping time to memorize those philosophy theories. Those time was so stressful I just don’t want to continue. I know that I am not a smart person so I just spent more time on it. I believed I can do it only if I study hard. At the same time ,I am really jealous people who slept on class,play games all day and didn’t finish their homeworks but still got very good marks. I felt angry that is unfair. But I ignore that how proud were I that I thought I can do everything by myself. I couldnt find the balance of my own life. I felt exhausted and the huge stress made me cannot breath, I just wanna quit, I gave up and admit that I am a failure. this is how my study life was before I know god. And now, I study hard and pray hard as well I hope god can help me with my study. for my first semester result, there is a really tough subject called anatomy, because there are so many words I cannot even read it but I have to memorised them, I was a arts student, it is not easy to involve myself into science area. It is amazing that I got exactly 50% to pass this subject and got gpa 5 in total for this semester. I knew it is not a proud ale marks ,but gods mercy is enough for me, I found balance and peaceful in gods.
In terms of emotion,I had some wrong thought about marriage. I thought that there is no need to have marriage, because it is impossible to get together with one person for whole life. Why not just live with someone and break up if there is no feeling any more. I didn’t mind to be a single mum if I am financial independent. I can do it by myself. This is what other people do in this society. maybe this is the life should be. Live without pressure and responsibility. It is ideal life. Anyway this is what I thought before. But after I accept Christ, I found security in god and I realized that life is not just about have fun. Some opinion and action in this society most people do, it seems like right, but it is not that way. Why I should follow the wrong instead of truth, why I should do something just as most people do. god want us to have Godly family,I don’t want to listen to the wrong opinion in the society.I appreciate god changed my mind that I will follow the truth, follow his plan.
I was a non believer, when I was in China,I knew almost nothing about god, I just knew that the man called Jesus is the god for western people, nothing to do with eastern people. But in bible(Jeremiah 29:14)I will be found by you and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile. I really appreciate god draw me back, he is so merciful that he forgive me sin and draw me back. Look back the short but amazing journey, I got water baptise in Melbourn during OC, that the first time I really touched by holy spirit, I began to cry, all the things happened in the past emergent in my brain like a movie. Those are something I thought I don’t care or I already forgot actually I just hide it in my heart try not to touch it. After the leader pray for me, I felt the real freedom, relax and easy. And then I decided to follow god and promise him I will follow his plan instead of my own will. After that, I got holy spirit baptise during church conference and pastor Wilson prayed for me, I feel so blessed. Actually in the beginning, I didn’t believed in speak in tongue.I can be a mute in heaven ,I don’t mind. However,after holy spirit baptize I felt that speak in tongue is not decided by ourselves, it is natural thing to do. give faith to god and just release the power of god.
at the same time, I felt struggle whether should I devoted all my life to god or just be a partly Christian? As I grow in god, I feel kind of burden and stress, because there is responsibilities as well. Especially when my shepherd told me to help coordinate the food during the uni-advance. i don’t want to but I know what I can do is obedient. But I am not that activate in the first, my leader she did almost everything for our group and what I did is just discuss with her and suggest that how about we change spring onion to onion, is cheaper. Because I am not sure should I involve myself too much into serving people and god, I just want to go to church and lifegroup regularly, that’s all I want to do. during the uni-advance, holy spirit touched me again, I realized that I cannot live without him. My life changed so much because of his selfless love. And I do want to serve people instead of just thinking about myself. I don’t want to be a selfish person, i don’t want disappointed him.
What god has done to me is so amazing, I want to encourage non believers and young believers to soften your hearts and have faith in god, life will be different. Especially people from China, because we don’t have Christian background, why not open our heart to seek the truth ourselves instead of listen to others told us what is the truth. This journey is so amazing, and the destination is eternal life.
for the awards, and also for letting us be a part of the clubs.
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